Prophet Muhammad's Treatment of His Family & Companions
God Almighty described His messenger Muhammad (peace be upon him) by saying: "And indeed, you are of a great moral character". God described him thus only for the greatness of his noble manners in Islam and the loftiness of their status.
In this article, an explanation is provided of the exemplary manner of the Prophet in his treatment of his family, companions, children, and even his enemies.
The Prophet's Noble Treatment of His Family
The Prophet's noble treatment of his family was a comprehensive display of good character. He showed kindness to the elderly and the young, serving himself and his household. He would mend his shoes and patch his garments, treating his wives in accordance with their wisdom and intellect. He would jest with and race with them, as he used to race with Aisha. When food was presented to him, he would eat it if he desired, and if not, he would leave it without criticizing. He would only get angry when he saw the sanctities of God being violated, never for personal reasons. He addressed each of his wives by their preferred names, calling Aisha, for example, "O Aa'ish!" when Gabriel greeted her. He used to kiss one of his wives while fasting, as Aisha reported. Among the ways to foster love between spouses, as the Prophet said, is through spending on them, even if it is just a morsel of food you lift to your wife's mouth. This act increases affection and is considered a form of charity.
Another aspect of the Prophet's behavior was his expression of affection towards his wives and his openness about his love for them. He compared his love for Aisha to a tight knot in a rope, reminding her of the continuity of his affection. He would sit with his wives, entertain them, and listen to them. Once, he sat with Aisha and listened to her narrate a story from the pre-Islamic era, filling his heart with joy. Despite his responsibilities, he always found time to sit with and accompany his wives whenever they wished. He would pray sitting, reciting while sitting, and when about thirty or forty verses remained, he would stand and recite them, then bow and prostrate, repeating the same in the second unit of prayer. After finishing, he would look around, and if I were awake, he would talk to me, and if I were asleep, he would lie down.
This behavior didn't conflict with his dedication to worship at that time, as being with one's wife is also considered an act of worship. Among the great kindnesses the Prophet showed his wives was what he did with Aisha when the Abyssinians were playing in the mosque with their spears. She said, "So the Messenger of Allah covered me with his cloth while I was watching them play, and I continued watching until I left". The Prophet would consult his wives on matters concerning the community, not just on a family level. During the Treaty of Hudaybiyyah, when one of the conditions was that they return without completing their pilgrimage rites, the companions disagreed. He consulted Umm Salamah, and she suggested that he go out to them, not speaking to anyone, and sacrifice his animal and shave his head. If they saw him doing that, they would do the same. He followed her advice, and the companions followed suit. He also advised on the treatment of women, even in the face of their misconduct, saying, "Treat women kindly. Woman was created from a rib, and the most crooked part of the rib is the top. If you try to straighten it, you will break it. So, treat women kindly".
The Prophet's Noble Treatment of His Companions
The Prophet's noble treatment of his companions was characterized by kindness and forgiveness towards those who erred. He often consulted them in various matters, assured them of victory, and strengthened their resolve. He showed his love for them in his interactions, describing each with a unique attribute, fostering affection and love between them. For instance, he described Zubair ibn al-Awwam as his companion, Abu Bakr and Umar ibn al-Khattab as his ministers, made Hudhayfah ibn al-Yaman his confidant, and entrusted Aamir ibn al-Jarrah with the affairs of the nation. He would jest with his companions, share meals with them, and participate in their joys and sorrows. Once, Jabir ibn Abdullah narrated that the Prophet came to him on a day and gestured for him to accompany him. He took Jabir's hand and led him to one of his wives' rooms. The Prophet entered, and Jabir was permitted to enter. The Prophet asked his family if there was any food, and they brought three loaves of bread. The Prophet took one and placed it in front of Jabir, then took another and placed it in front of himself, and then took the third, broke it in half, and placed one half in front of Jabir and the other half in front of himself, saying, "Is there any condiment?" They replied, "Nothing but some vinegar". He said, "Bring it; indeed, vinegar is excellent".
He empathized with his companions' sadness and shared in their joy, considering their emotional states and lifting their spirits. He was always present with them, feeling their pain and trying to alleviate it in any way he could. In times of hardship, like during the Battle of the Trench when food was scarce, he refused to eat without sharing with them, calling out to them, "O people of the trench! Jabir has built a barrier, so welcome it as you welcome your family". When they were disheartened, he offered practical solutions to uplift their morale, reminding them of Allah's support and the rewards awaiting them in the Hereafter. He would eat, drink, and dress like them, erasing any distinction between himself and his companions.
The Prophet's Noble Treatment of Children
The Prophet of Allah treated children with gentleness and tenderness, showing compassion towards them. This was evident in his interactions with his son Ibrahim and his grandsons Hassan and Hussein. Anas ibn Malik described this treatment, saying, "I have never seen anyone more compassionate towards children than the Messenger of Allah. His son Ibrahim was being nursed in the city of Al-Madinah, and he would go to him, and we would go with him, and he would enter the house, and it would be full of smoke. He would take him and kiss him, and then he would return him". The Prophet's duties and responsibilities did not distract him from showing affection and tenderness to his children. Anas ibn Malik described the Prophet as the kindest among people towards children, perhaps influenced by his close association with the Prophet from a young age. The Prophet would kiss children, carry them, embrace them to his chest, and play with them. He would carry Hassan and Usama ibn Zaid, embrace them, and pray for them. He would carry Hassan and Hussein on his back and walk with them. He would encourage children to come to him, and they would run to him and fall upon him, and he would take them and kiss them.
The Prophet Muhammad would also be kind to children by giving them gifts. For example, Najashi gifted him a ring with a gold seal, and he gave it to his granddaughter Umamah, Zainab's daughter. He used to call Anas by names other than his own in a playful manner. When addressing Anas, he would affectionately say, "O possessor of two ears". When a young brother of Anas ibn Malik passed away, the Prophet consoled him sympathetically and playfully, asking, "O Abu 'Umair, what happened to the little sparrow?" Mahmoud ibn Al-Rabi', one of the young companions, described how the Prophet once marked his face with his hand as a playful gesture when he was five years old.
The Prophet was considerate of children's feelings and limited understanding. When he stood up for prayer, and Umamah bint Abi Al-'As was with him, he would place her beside him for bowing and prostration. Then, when he stood up, he would take her. When the Prophet prostrated, Al-Hasan and Al-Hussein would climb onto his back and play. He would prolong the prostration until they dismounted and stood up. When the companions asked him about this, he explained that he wanted to attend to their needs for playing. On another occasion, while delivering a sermon, the Prophet saw Al-Hasan approaching, so he lifted him onto the pulpit and declared, "This son of mine is a master. I hope that Allah will reconcile two groups of my Ummah through him". The Prophet did not reprimand him or forbid him from doing so. Just as Islam forbade lying to adults, it also prohibited it for children. The Prophet adhered to this principle. When the mother of Abdullah ibn Amr ibn Al-As called her son to give him something while the Prophet was present, she asked him what she intended to give him. He replied that if she did not give it to him, she would be lying.
The Prophet's Noble Treatment of His Enemies
The Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, was keen to send Muslims to the Arab tribes of the polytheists to invite them to Islam. The Ghifar tribe was one of the strongest tribes in Medina, and the Messenger of Allah sent Abu Dharr al-Ghifari to ask them to the message of Islam. A large number of them responded positively, with nearly half of them embracing Islam. The Messenger of Allah would send teachers to educate them about their religion. On the other hand, the Prophet also emphasized displaying the strength and power of the Muslims to the polytheists to prevent them from thinking that Muslims were weak and vulnerable. He also sought to establish treaties with other tribes surrounding Medina to ensure the rights of Muslims.
Upon his arrival in Medina, the Prophet immediately established the Constitution of Medina, which regulated the relationship between the Emigrants and the Helpers (Ansar) among the Muslims and the Jewish tribes. This created a united front against the enemies of the city. The Prophet said, "Whoever has a treaty with a people should not dissolve it or make it shorter until its term expires or he sees a clear breach". The Prophet fulfilled his treaties and agreements with non-Muslims faithfully. For example, Hudhayfah ibn al-Yaman and his father were captives of the disbelievers, but they were released in exchange for not fighting alongside the Prophet. Later, when they wanted to join the Prophet in the Battle of Badr, the Prophet sent them back, honoring his commitment to them. When these polytheists were captured by the Muslims, the Prophet treated them kindly, as happened with the captives of Badr.
When Umayr ibn Wahb conspired with Safwan ibn Umayyah to assassinate the Prophet in exchange for Safwan taking care of his family, Allah inspired the Prophet to approach Umayr. When Umayr came close, the Prophet informed him about Islam, and he embraced it. Similarly, Fudalah ibn Umayr intended to kill the Prophet, but when the Prophet placed his hand on his chest, Fudalah calmed down and embraced Islam. The Prophet was kind to his neighbor, a Jew, who fell ill. Seizing the opportunity, the Prophet invited him to Islam, and his son obeyed the Prophet's order to embrace Islam. As the Prophet left, he thanked Allah for saving him from the Fire.
The Importance of Ethics in Dealing with People
Islam has given ethics a great status and made them one of the most important reasons for the prophethood of our master Muhammad, peace be upon him. He said, "I was only sent to perfect noble character". Good ethics are among the fundamental principles upon which Islam is based. For Islam, good character is like standing at Arafat during Hajj; Hajj is not valid without standing at Arafat, and similarly, Islam is not valid without good character. Adhering to good ethics is considered one of the greatest deeds that will weigh heavily on the scales on the Day of Judgment. It is also the criterion for differentiation among believers before Allah. The Prophet Muhammad said, "Nothing is placed on the scale that is weightier than good character".
The Prophet Muhammad used to supplicate to Allah during the night prayers to grant him good character and complete it. He was the best of people in character. He would say, "Guide me to the best of character; none guides to the best of it except You. And turn me away from its evil, and none can turn me away from its evil except You". This is evidence of Allah's love for good ethics. Another indication of the importance of ethics is the abundance of evidence in the Quran, whether in Meccan or Medinan verses, emphasizing the necessity of adhering to them in all aspects of life and warning against abandoning them. Ethics are inherent to a Muslim in all circumstances, much like creed is in that regard.
